Make Any Decision in Your Life with Confidence
Have you ever struggled with that analysis paralysis feeling when you are trying to make a decision? You know that feeling of “Should I do this? Or maybe that? Or maybe there is something I haven’t thought of yet that I need to figure out first?” And then before you know it you’ve let all the questions and “What if” scenarios circle around and around in your head that it’s now a whole week later and you still haven’t decided what to do and you haven’t taken any action to move forward due to lack of clarity & confidence.
How do you get over that lack of clarity and confidence when making any decision in life? Some of you have probably felt that feeling too many times to count about not knowing what to do in the little decisions and even more so with the big decisions. And now as a result of that, if you are anything like how I used to be, you probably have wasted so much time trying to decide what do that it makes you sick even thinking about all the time you have wasted letting your analysis paralysis take over. I hear you, girl. I used to feel that exact same way too. But then something changed.
There’s a way to make every decision in your life 2X faster than you ever have before and to do it with complete clarity that makes you feel fully confident after you make the decision as well. That means you are more productive, more efficient and ultimately crossing off more “To Dos” on your list and feeling confidently in control of what you are doing in your life each day and how you are doing it.
Wouldn’t that feel phenomenal? Think about it for a minute. Wouldn’t that feel incredible to actually live from that feeling of “I’m totally killin it and it’s not even noon yet!”
I sure as heck thought it would too! So what did I do about it? I kicked analysis paralysis to the curb and chose to trudge through the uncomfortable work to figure out how to make this happen.
As I began to dig in to find a solution of how to make decisions 2x faster and with complete confidence, I realized it’s not as hard as it may seem. In fact, it’s really simple actually. It’s two steps and although these two steps take intentional time to figure out in the beginning, they save you thousands of hours afterwards when you have it completed.
So you’re probably wondering what these two keys for “To Do” list & life decisions success in life really are?
Don’t worry friend, I got your back on this. Let’s dive right in!
The Two Step Success Formula for making Decisions with Total Confidence & Clarity:
1.Know your values & core desired feelings and only make decisions that align with your core values & feelings. So you’re probably thinking, “Well, yeah Manda, I get that, but it’s just not that easy.” And I’m here to gently interrupt that fear pattern of your inner critic who’s saying, “There’s no way something so simple can make that big of a difference.” Because yes it can. I’m living proof of that along with all the people I have helped through coaching to do this exact same process.
The key is truly understanding what your core values and core desired feelings are. You can’t simple sit down and list out core values of (Family, Friends, & Success) and then list out core desired feelings of (Love, Joy, Happiness, and peace). Instead you need to dive in deeper and do the work to unpack what the real meaning is behind why you have the values that you do and understand what each of your values means to you. Similarly for your core desired feelings, you can’t just write down words that sound good and that would be nice to feel. Your core desired feelings process is essentially choosing to do the things that will make you feel one of these ways and creating experiences through your decisions each day to feel these emotions.
For your core desired feelings, the best resource to use to figure these out is the book, The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte. I recommend this book to every coaching client I work with because it is truly that powerful!
Once you know the specific reasons why you have chosen the 3-5 core values that you have as well as the 3-7 core desired feelings that you want to feel each day, now you are on your way to making every decision in your life with pure confidence & clarity.
2. Know the rules and beliefs that you live by. I call this creating your personal commandments or you can also create your personal contract with yourself. So what in the world does this all entail?
For creating your personal commandments, think of it as the rules & truths that you believe and choose to live your life in alignment with. For example, one of my personal commandments is, “When you feel helpless, help someone”. You can choose as many as you want, but the key here is to know who you are and what really matters to you – AKA self-awareness. The more self-awareness you have the more powerful & meaningful your personal commandments become. Side note: If you’re the girl wondering, “I think I’m pretty self-aware, but how would I even know or become more self-aware?” I’ve got the answer for you….personality assessments! Anything like the Myers Briggs, DISC, Strengths Finder, Enneagram, or VIA Survey of Character Strengths are great resources to learn more about who you are and how you are showing up in the world.
Now for creating your personal contract. Think of this as a standard that you will follow through on and live by. It’s all about giving yourself permission to be who you want and keeping promises to yourself that matter to you. I create my personal contract with myself each year and print it off and sign it as a promise of how I will show up in the world that year and where my focus will be. For example, I break down my own personal contract into the three different sections below:
- I Promise To:
- Show up and have the courage to be vulnerable every single day on this earth.
- I Want to Be:
- More loving in every interaction I have with people.
- I Believe:
- I am capable, resourceful, and whole as I am right now, and yet my potential is limitless for my future.
Now you may be thinking this is all too much internal work. And I’ll be 100% honest with you, it is hard work and it does take intentional time, however every single minute of it is worth it! The more vulnerable and honest you are with yourself as you are creating these pieces, the more value you will get in using these as your guide for making decisions with pure confidence to save thousands of hours on the back end. Can I hear a loud “AMEN!”to that?!
You might still be a little skeptical, and I get it, friend. I SO get it. It’s like you totally want to go for it and do it, but your fear is telling you that there is no way that creating these rules, values, permissions, and promises will stop your analysis paralysis from kicking in. I’m here to promise to you that is does. And I don’t make promises I can’t keep. I’m here to urge you to think outside of the box of how you have been operating and living your life because let’s be honest – you know you are sick of that analysis paralysis process and how much time it sucks out of your day and how it delays all the things you want to get done and essentially can steal your dreams from you if you let it. You deserve more. Give yourself permission to say “YES!” to you and choose to do this work to take back your life.
When you have deeper self-awareness about who you are and what you stand for, you not only make decisions faster because you have a beautiful and clear guide of what to use to make those decisions, but you also create more self confidence in who you are as a human being. If you’re anything like me, there is always a part of your life that you are looking to be more confident in. I have to say that I’ve never been as confident as I am now in my life after knowing my values, my core desired feelings, my personal commandments, and knowing my promises & permissions of how I want to intentionally live my life every single day.
Give yourself the gift of time and confidence by intentionally choosing to dive in to both of these self-awareness building tools today! You are worth the time and you deserve to live your life the way you want instead of stuck in confusion & insecurity. You got this, girl!
This is your one life – live it with beautiful intention!
Now it’s time for some accountability. Because this tool is only good if you choose to implement it. Share in the comments below when you are choosing to work on creating one of these tools or if you already have created them, I would love to hear how they have impacted you!
Hugs & Mochas,
Amanda
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